9.29.2011

thoughts, part two

every other morning, i've been spending an hour at yoga before work. what started out as a desire to stretch my limbs has turned into something way more for me. the teacher that i'm going to now has really been focusing on one particular lesson for us to meditate on before we begin our practice. she asks us all to acknowledge one person or situation that we feel is toxic to our health, hold onto it for a moment, and then let it go. when i got sick recently, it was easy for me to feel helpless and complain. i have also struggled with uneasiness and stress brought on by other people over the course of my life. but these meditations have shown me that letting negative feelings consume me is exactly what toxic people want: they want their own unhappiness to be met by someone else; their insecurities are projected on to others. instead of dwelling on these thoughts, i am making a conscious effort during yoga (and off the mat) to acknowledge their presence, but only for a moment before letting them go.

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